It’s been a long summer. With weeks slipping into months of nothingness, riddled with guilt at your inability to effectively do any academic work while lamenting not finding an internship, thoughts drift to those heady winter months of college football delight…

But fear no more, college football fans, for CUAFL is back this weekend, seeing new kits, new players and new fluorescent boots that you really shouldn’t be wearing considering your (at best) shaky ability. Hundreds of football-starved males are about to take to the pristine pitches for another season founded on high hopes and more often than not ending in disappointment.

To further whet your college football appetites, the draw for the opening round of Cuppers was made on Tuesday night. Cuppers champions St John’s and Premier League champions Downing will both be in action on the opening weekend, as they set out on the long road to fabled college football glory.

Cupper’s

Varsity’s predicted final:

Fitzwilliam           vs            St John’s

 

The First Round Draw

 

Clare Hall            vs           Girton

St John’s             vs           Corpus

Magdalene          vs            King’s

Pembroke           vs            BYE

 

Christ’s               vs            Darwin

Jesus                  vs            BYE

St Catherine’s      vs           Trinity Hall

Caius                  vs            BYE

 

Trinity                 vs           Queens’

Selwyn                vs           BYE

Emma                 vs           Robinson

Peterhouse          vs           BYE

 

Fitzwilliam           vs            Downing

Clare                  vs            BYE

Sidney Sussex     vs            Churchill

Homerton            vs            BYE

 

 

At the Captain’s meeting on Tuesday night, the first round of this year’s Cuppers tournament was made – casting aside any question of a fixed ballot, unlike perhaps in previous years… (Fitz vs John’s last year? Come on now…)

The draw sees over half of the top flight entering at the First Round by missing out on a tricky fixture against the super club ‘Bye’, who will be playing seven fixtures simultaneously. Not even Ryan Giggs could manage that (he doesn’t have enough brothers).

The awarding of byes has already broken Cuppers records, with Division Five side Peterhouse making it to the furthest stage of the tournament in their history. A stellar achievement, in no part helped by JCR President and top scorer RON. However, their stunning cup run probably won’t go any further. Whoever wins out of Robinson and Emma in the corresponding fixture is basically guaranteed a Quarter Final spot.

The standout tie is undoubtedly (and unbiasedly – honest) Fitzwilliam against Downing. Last year’s Champions face the troubling prospect of crashing out in the first round, and will be lamenting a tough trip to Oxford Road, with Fitzwilliam set to conquer everyone and everything this season. Fitzwilliam is Glorious.

The Opening Round of fixtures will take place on the weekend of the 31st October/1st November.

 

Premier League

Varsity’s Predictions:

1. Fitzwilliam
2. St John’s
3. Downing
4. Pembroke
5. Jesus
6. Selwyn
7. Trinity Hall
8. Queens’
9. Caius
10. Churchill

 

Last season Varsity famously stuck two fingers up to The Tab for correctly predicting that Downing would win the title, and this season we hope to do the same again. Our (mainly my) champion for this coming season is Fitzwilliam, not only for obvious reasons (being glorious/best college football side in history etc – you get the picture) but also because Fitzwilliam look to be the strongest they have been for a while. With a strong core carrying over from last season, and a half decent representation in the University set up, Fitz are the side to look out for.

The title, of course, will not be a foregone conclusion and the likes of Downing and Pembroke will certainly hope to push Fitz all the way. Having missed out for a second consecutive year on a first ever Cupper’s title, Pembroke will be looking to rectify their gaping hole in the trophy cabinet with a successful league campaign. Downing, meanwhile, who famously won the title based (pretty much entirely) on building a strong defence just like Chelsea of last year, will again be in and among the contenders, especially if they can pull off another season of avoiding draws and picking up one goal wins. However, if Chelsea are the Downing equivalent, then this season may not be so quite so rosy for the Downing faithful…

Jesus, who notoriously are always a strong outfit, may underperform this year by their own standards. Having lost a couple of key players, the title may just lie beyond reach this time around. However, Jesus are well known for having a strong fresher pool, and this makes them very much an unknown quantity, and a potential dark horse. Selwyn likewise started last season very well but as the heat was turned up they fell away. Again, a strong campaign is possible, and if they can find consistency, they could easily finish higher than sixth, as we have predicted.

Unlike last season, expect the relegation battle to be a lot less of a foregone conclusion. Last year St Catherine’s and King’s bombed out of the league quicker than Richard Keys at a feminist rally. Trinity Hall, champions of two years ago, could well be dragged into the dogfight after an unconvincing campaign last time around – the question they now ask is whether their golden generation has been and gone. Newly promoted sides Queens’ and Churchill have both been predicted as strugglers this season but don’t be surprised if they pull up a few trees this year. Churchill finished last season unbeaten, winning a tightly fought promotion battle in what was a very strong Second Division. Queens’ pushed them all the way, and of the two, I’m going to stick my neck out and say Queens’ are the more likely to beat the drop. But this mainly stems from the fact that there is only room for one Hill College in the top flight.

Gonville and Caius also could be fearing the worst this year. Having lost their University squad members, they will certainly be praying for a strong Fresher draft to help maintain their Premier League status. As things stand, they look set to be heading for the second tier.

St John’s also play football and are in the Premier League.

 

Division Two

Varsity’s Predictions:

1. Robinson
2. Girton
3. Trinity
4. Darwin
5. Long Road
6. Homerton
7. King’s
8. Queens’ II
9. St Catherines
10. Emma

The Second Division is notoriously difficult to predict, and, if last year is anything to go by, then the promotion race will be fiercely contested. Expect Darwin, Girton, Trinity and newly promoted side Robinson to be in and around the top spots. Robinson, after storming through the third division, could easily secure back-to-back promotions and with another seemingly strong fresher cohort, they definitely will be near the top rather than the bottom. Darwin and Girton both narrowly missed out on promotion last year during what was a thrilling promotion battle, with the top three going unbeaten for the majority of the season. Darwin finished fourth last season, and will hope to launch another promotion challenge, so long as not too many of their players are old enough to collect pensions. Girton narrowly missed out last year and I think this time around they might just be able to make the top two, mainly due to the fact that they regularly receive a tidal wave of open space-loving freshers, as well as having a much fitter squad than most due to the enormous distances they have to cover just to get to lectures. Trinity too, despite taking a while to get going last season, should be looking for a higher place finish this time out. At the other end, Emma are favourites to go down; despite saving themselves on the last day last season, this season may just be a bridge too far for them. Relegated former Premier League sides St Catherine’s and King’s will definitely be praying for a strong fresher intake; if they continue as they finished last season, then back to back drops are a real possibility.

Homerton and Long Road, the latter I have nothing to say about seeing as I have no clue how good they are, can all expect mid table finishes unless of course Homerton bolster their ranks sufficiently with freshers to arrest their slow decline over the last couple of seasons. Queens’ II’s deserve a special mention for somehow making it into the second tier, the highest placed Second string side from any college. Expect a tough season for them, but if they can avoid the First team stealing too many of their players, they could well stay up.

 

The opening round of fixtures is this weekend.