First, an admission: until the Churchill Spring Ball committee asked me to cook for them, I had never heard of The Rumble Strips. A bit of Spotifying later I realised I loved this brass-tinged, honey-voice, Dutch-pop band hailing from Devon, but did I hell know what to cook for them. Help arrived in the form of the band’s ‘hospitality rider’ – no, that’s not a domestic groupie, but actually a piece of paper listing, in precise detail, no fewer than 23 dressing room essentials. Making 160 triangular sandwiches is not a problem to a seasoned kitchen dogsbody such as myself, but who on earth wants fresh chillies to eat with their Jameson Whisky?

The superstar rider had mythological status in the world of showbiz. Perhaps the most famous diva is Jennifer Lopez, who routinely demands a white dressing room with white curtains and white roses and a security guard who must remain within four feet of her at all times and refer to her as ‘No.1’, although Jim Carrey’s pet iguana who demands its own vegetarian cook on location comes in a close second. I have great respect for Britney Spears, who, when playing on Top of the Pops, demanded a bowl of fresh tuna salad, with Hellmann’s mayo, eggs, relish and albacore tuna only. Well, I may not be able to tell albacore tuna from the bog-standard dolphin-friendly, but one has to respect a member of the transnational elite plumping for this nation’s (arguably) most famous condiment. Another albacore tuna-eating star is Mariah Carey who notoriously requested a litter of puppies and kittens for an MTV appearance – not to eat, obviously. On many levels the Spring Ball committee came off lightly; The Rumble Strips only demanded five ‘clean, dry towels’ to P Diddy’s 204.

Eventually I decided that these canny lads with a penchant for local ales would appreciate that greatest of County Durham dishes – sausage casserole with rice. Ladling it out to the ravenous band I was struck by just how much I resembled their mother, making sure that they all had a good dinner in them before they went on stage. I tried hard not be piqued when the keyboard player cut up a chilli to sprinkle over his casserole – sign of a decrepit palate. Despite this effrontery, four members even had seconds, filling me with maternal pride.

Perched on a saxophone case I chatted to the boys about life on the road and the perils of trying to eat well before gigs. "So, is this a change from takeaways? What do you tend to eat on tour?" I asked. "Er…this," said the tour manager, pointing to the rider. Well, blow me, I thought.

A hot meal inside them, the Strips played an excellent set, for which I take much of the credit. The way to a band interview, like the way to a man’s heart, is truly through their stomach.

Sausage Casserole (to serve 7 indie rockers)

3 tbsp cooking oil
3 garlic cloves
1 inch piece of ginger
4 onions
18 fat pork sausages
3 peppers
3 cans of tomatoes
2 tbsp tomato purée
Any leftover veg 2 apples
1 cup of apple juice 1 kilo of rice

Any herbs/spices/booze you fancy throwing in the frying pan

1. Begin by heating some oil in the largest heavy bottomed frying pan you can find.

2. Chop up the garlic and ginger real fine and cook until soft. Have someone who wears contacts (top tip) chop the onion and add those to the pan and fry until soft.

3. Next, slice your sausages (buying a slightly more expensive and meaty one does make a heck of a difference) and add to the pan, followed by the chopped peppers, tomatoes, puree and any other veg.

4. When everything is bubbling throw in some cubed, unpeeled apple (something flavoursome like a Cox works well) and the apple juice.

5.Cook until the apple is soft and the sauce has thickened slightly. Season with salt, pepper and spices TASTING AS YOU GO. Serve with rice, yoghurt and maybe even a little cheese. Nom.