Where were you when the Queen died? I was at a tapas bar in Folkestone, Her Majesty’s death knell coming in the form of a chef’s mournful sobs. And last night, as a shrouded chaise longue cortège slowly processed down to the stage of the Robinson Auditorium, I was pleased to see that Lucia Quadrini’s production of King Charles III was just as camp. Staged and set in this anarchic limbo between the Queen’s death and Prince Charles’ coronation, it’s timely, funny, and with projections of Queen Elizabeth’s state funeral, a little uncanny. Despite lulls in energy and a rather long running time, King Charles III is well worth the pomp and circumstance.

“It’s timely, funny, and a little uncanny”

Written in blank verse (that’s dee-DUM, dee-DUM), Mark Bartlett’s script is nothing less than a Shakespearean history play for the modern day. The new King Charles III (Atharva Argade-Miskin) refuses to give Royal Assent to a Bill put forward by the PM (Joseph Wolffe, who looks like Corbyn and sounds like Blair) which would regulate the press. Far-fetched it may be, but stranger things have happened! (Remember that queue…)

In a rather starry-eyed and Romantic presentation of the British, the country swiftly descends into riots, and only two of the chicest young royals can save the country from the throes of civil war. The script shows its age in its references to the 2011 News International phone hacking scandal, but talk of proroguing parliament brings it back to the future.

Argade-Miskin’s tentative performance as a Hamlet-esque King Charles is shaky but apt for a new monarch. There’s a smattering of Romeo and Juliet with Prince Harry’s star-crossed love for republican Jess (Eliza Harrison); his desire to break free from the Firm to be with his lover saves you the fiver on a discounted copy of Spare. Special mention must be given to a wonderful Camilla Parker-Bowles (Elizabeth Kate Weber) whose performance of a headstrong Queen Consort in pearls and pyjamas is nevertheless poignant.

“An entertaining look at the state of the monarchy and the tough act that Charles was born to follow”

When the cast shake off their royal imposter syndrome and revel in the more bizarre scenes, then they really start to shine. Oscar Griffin is stellar as the mass-marketed and often-resurrected Diana — the People’s Princess. With her iconic wedding dress and demure fluttering of the eyes, Diana’s ghost returns to prophesy that Charles shall be ‘the greatest king we ever had,’ and then prophesies the same for William. Classic Di. The cast worked well as an ensemble, nailing the baying and mooing of MPs in the House of Commons, but Alice Roberts was captivating going solo as Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, with soliloquies that had me rooting for a royal.

The real issue with the production is its length. Though it sweet-talks with the odd rhyme (“But with respect… you’re not elect”), it’s nearly three hours including an interval, and is weighed down by pregnant pauses and an ambulatory pace. Since it can’t be cut down, the actors would do well to take Hamlet’s advice and deliver the iambic pentameter “trippingly on the tongue.” And despite some moments of music, entrances and exits wanted fanfare to mask the awkward silences — not helped at all by the enormity of the stage.

There is certainly a simplicity to the production design, embellished solely by Quadrini and assistant director Manon Harvey’s attention to detail with the costuming: the mirroring of Kate and Jess’ red costumes was subtle but just right; King Charles’ robes carried real gravitas. And we’ll try not to be offended by the Varsity newspapers strewn across the stage as riot material…

Perennial if peripheral, the Royal Family still seem to be hanging around, walking anachronisms cutting ribbons and wearing crowns of contested foreign treasures. Bartlett’s play is long, and when the energy dips, it drags. But when the actors hit their stride, Quadrini’s production of King Charles III becomes an entertaining look at the state of the monarchy and the tough act that Charles was born to follow. In the fictional words of our ‘newly-minted’ King, there’s only one question left: “Shall I be mother?”

King Charles III is playing at the Robinson College Auditorium, Wednesday 15th to Saturday 18th February, 7:30pm.