There are so many ridiculously attractive people in my lectures. How can I approach them without seeming creepy?

Imagine it’s 9am and you're stumbling into your lecture, still wrecked from the mistake that was Sunday Life. Looking around, you realise that you have no idea what lecture you’re actually attending and that, among the sunken, miserable faces before you, you recognise exactly zero, and so you are banished yet again to an empty corner of the room. It is on such mornings that those fortunate enough to possess that awkward yet endearing beauty, seemingly native to the Cambridge bubble, are there to brighten our days; their presence is a public service for which we must be forever grateful. And this, dear reader, is precisely why I can empathise with your painfully relatable struggle.

First things first, though, I think we need to set two things straight. One: approaching people, whether you know them or not, is something you do every day and there should be no reason that the people in your lectures are any different, even if they are ridiculously attractive. Two: assuming you haven’t accidentally turned up at the wrong lecture and decided to stick it out to avoid the awkward early exit, you and said person(s) have very obvious mutual interests, and have, as fate would have it, ended up in the same vicinity for perfectly legitimate reasons – so it would be an incredibly arduous task to actually make the approach creepy.

“One day I will discover the identity of ‘Very Tall, Very Blonde, Always Asks a Question at the End’”

That said, perhaps the most stress-free and calculated method of befriending such folk does come laden with implicit ‘creepiness’: the Facebook stalk. While I wouldn’t exactly recommend this pastime as a healthy or particularly reliable route to successful courtship, I would bet my bottom dollar that you will find it impossible to resist the urge to do so.

If you are lucky enough to actually know the name of any of the ridiculously attractive people, you’ve already gained an advantage in this field. If, however, like the majority of us, you only identify them by referring to their most dominant, most attractive feature (one day I will discover the identity of ‘Very Tall, Very Blonde, Always Asks a Question at the End’), then Facebook stalking transitions from menial hobby to Olympic-level sport.

If you are successful in finding your needle in a haystack, the next logical (to use the term very, very loosely) step is browsing their upcoming events. They’re bound to have registered their interest in something remotely appealing and, if not, maybe they aren’t worth the hassle anyway. In order to make this step as non-stalkery as possible, I would suggest actually going to an event that you want to attend, with a group of your own friends, with the very suppressed hope of ‘accidentally’ bumping into and conversing with that stunner from your lecture. This way, even if you fail, you’re having fun – I’d hope.

However, not to encourage potentially inappropriate and unwarranted advances and awkward situations in dark and busy clubs, there is always the more tried-and-tested method of simple, direct conversation. Admittedly, lectures aren’t the ideal place to get to know somebody, but pubs and cafés can be: organising a subject meet-up via Facebook is always a good way of getting everyone together, including those you have your eye on. If social media isn’t your thing, inviting people you know from different colleges, and asking them to ask around, also tends to work. Either way, talking to the people you fancy outside of the lecture halls is probably the best way to go about it, and isn’t a bad way to make new friends, either.

Agony Aunt: Overcoming insecurities

At the end of the day, it’s all about having the confidence to go for it. The creepiness is a minor concern, considering you have good reason for wanting to get to know them better (which can always be relied upon as an escape route if it transpires they do not reciprocate the attraction). Consider your first and most important task to be making friends on your course from beyond your college and existing friendship circle. It would be a very pleasant, very much desired bonus if one of these people happened to be ridiculously attractive, but let’s admit there are ways of manipulating such situations so that you just so happen to wind up in conversation with them. Once you have the platform to get to know them, the task seems a lot less daunting.

If all else fails, however, telling them that you were so infatuated and overwhelmed by their attractiveness that you had to seek advice from an Agony Aunt is surely an unbeatable compliment, is it not?