Another season of democracy is over: an end to what was, admittedly, an almost vaguely gripping student election campaign. There were harsh words, some ill-feeling – well, actually quite a bit of ill-feeling. (There were 53 complaints made, which, if anything, proves how seriously we Cantabs take our CV-fillers.)

Cynicism aside, I think things worked out well in the end. I know we student journos aren’t meant to write like this – it’s all ‘SCANDAL SCANDAL BUMS SCANDAL’. I’m not about that. There are better things to be scandalised by. 

I mean, really: what’s the point writing an article here picking out the odd negatives in Daisy’s campaign. I didn’t vote for Daisy – she was my second preference – yet I can’t help but feel it’s right she won. She really got out there – not only a regular feature of Sidgwick, but she got out to my college buttery (and no doubt others, too), and, I think, succeeded in getting her face known in what is a crowded field of known-faces. (Amatey and Tom Wang, take a bow.) She was also (fun fact) up against BNOCs #37 and #48. Well done, is all I have to say, and good luck.

Daisy’s victory is not the main reason for this piece. I want to draw some long-overdue attention to that lone warrior, that absolute hero of democracy. You know whom I’m talking about. You’ve probably voted for him. What a legend. Really.

“What does Ron do? He runs against that blatant title-collector. He makes candidates work for it. He gives us a choice, and that is democracy”

Every election. Every single election, from CUSU Education Officer down to treasurer of the Tiddlywinks Society, to president of Trinity JCR. There’s no stopping RON. No election is too minor or too obscure for him. His friends told him it was madness – “You can’t run in every election, RON! Not even Amatey has tried that!” So they said, and so he laughed.

Oh, there are many myths and legends surrounding RON. Some say he was the last JCR president of that college beneath the Cam. Oh, you’ve not heard of this? Well, the night of his great electoral triumph, as he was dancing his way to Fez (yeah…) to celebrate the scale of the landslide (the electorate was three, himself included), his college inexplicably sort of… slipped into the river. Ever since, he’s been doomed to roam the banks of the Cam, the streets of Cambridge, seeking to quench his cravings for electoral validity.

Now, don’t hold me to that. Accounts vary. Some say the college was Corpus back when they mattered. Whatever you believe about RON, there is no denying his herculean efforts in the name of democracy. Because what does RON do? He runs against that blatant title-collector. He makes candidates work for it. He gives us a choice, and that is democracy.

So spare a thought for RON. There’s no glory in being RON. He doesn’t win often, and when he does, everyone focuses on the other guy! The loser! Poor RON.

Cambridge students can build the foundations to end homelessness

“What can we do to show our gratitude to RON?” I hear you cry. Well, next time you’re confronted by the many-headed hydra of student democracy, why don’t you check out RON’s manifesto. That’s as good a starting point as any. He very handily puts it in brackets next to his name: ‘reopen nominations’.

Now, like so many great thinkers, RON’s words are not to be interpreted literally. What RON wants is for you to run. When you hear there is an uncontested office going in college or your society, why not have a go? Truth be told, RON would really appreciate it – he could do with a break from campaigning. And, as an aside, it could also maybe (just maybe) mean better candidates, better elections, and better outcomes for all of us? Time, I think, to put the ghost of RON to rest