Newly-released data from sex toys and lingerie retailer Ann Summers reveals that Cambridge students spent more on their products than students at any other university besides Oxford.

Oxford ranked first on their sex toy-spending league table, with its students purchasing £11,266 worth of orgasm-inducing, stress-reducing Ann Summers products in 2017. Cambridge students took second place with £9,410, and third and fourth went to Leeds and Manchester.

According to Ann Summers, its “Sexperts” have “known for many years that great sex and mind-blowing orgasms help us sleep better,” which may help explain why its products are so popular among sleep-deprived Oxford and Cambridge students.

Ann Summers also claimed that sex is “a natural antidepressant and is one of the most effective ways to ease anxiety,” making it even more obvious why Oxford and Cambridge have taken the top spots on their league table.

The data suggested that the most common outlet for supervision-induced anxiety was the “Rose Gold Pebble Vibrator,” which was the most popular sex toy at Cambridge, Oxford, and five of the ten top-spending universities. You, too, can release your stress like the country’s brightest minds for only £12.  

Intriguingly, Cambridge did not land among the top ten for universities where students have been spending the most time browsing Ann Summers’ website – suggesting either that Cantabs go in knowing exactly what they want, or a smaller group of students may be spending a lot more money.

Ann Summers said that there is even evidence that sex can make you smarter: “growing evidence shows that sex can actually help you develop stronger cognitive skills, including verbal fluency, number sequencing, and recall.”

This is potentially worrying for Cambridge if it wishes to assert an academic lead over its ancient rival – students at Oxford spent £1,856 more than Cambridge students, enough to buy 155 Rose Gold Pebble Vibrators.