The past six months have been interesting to say the least. Here I am about to return to Cambridge in my full glory as an officially dangerous driver (according to my driving test result), and no more fluent in French than I was in year seven. If anything, I have regressed, which is mildly unfortunate.

As a result, I figure that Cambridge can’t be so bad after all. Maybe, if nothing else, it will distract me from my optimistic ambitions? A term spent on European ethnographies will be a term well spent, or better spend than the lack of Easter term at any rate. At least I’ll spend less time trying to justify the existence of the subject to people because everyone will have given up asking by this point. Or maybe if I only surround myself with Anthropology students then the problem will cease to exist.

It is a bizarre thing to be returning to university when most of us have spent more time at home this year. On top of this, I also have serious concerns that my brain no longer functions at any level, which could prove to be a problem. My summer reading has turned into a summer sleeping, which has been blissful, but may meet hostility by supervisors. However, we will cross these bridges when we come to them.

“Social media has become flooded once more by pictures of flocks of students, radiating joy, having a merry time”

Writing this at home after a failed workout (I gave in after three minutes red faced and frazzled), I am acutely aware that most of my friends have returned to Cambridge. Social media has become flooded once more by pictures of flocks of students, radiating joy, having a merry time. Most of my friends have rushed back to Cambridge at the earliest possible notice, which is an indication that it is actually okay. My boyfriend is having a heavenly time without my presence, which is always reassuring too. It is great to know when you are appreciated.

In two weeks time I am sitting my driving theory test. Again. For the third time. My test will expire in about a day. I have no common sense knowledge about roads or life in general. But the thing is, failure isn’t an option because I have decreed it. Unfortunately my (lack of) natural ability seems to disagree with me. So I fear the struggle may continue.

“These past few weeks I have gone through all of the phases: the excited one, the apprehensive one, the nervous one, the indifferent one”

I’ve decided that I am actually slightly looking forward to going back to Cambridge. These past few weeks I have gone through all of the phases: the excited one, the apprehensive one, the nervous one, the indifferent one… you name it, I’ve probably been there. Now I’m (rather predictably) going through all of the phases in one. Whilst I’m not exactly relishing the thought of Zoom societies and socially-distanced everything, I’ve accepted that this will be the case. Being around lots of clueless 19 year olds again will be nice, because I’ve been missing the solidarity. I’ve missed the porters too, and their disapproval of my unwavering ability to burn toast. I’m not sure the microwaves will be pleased about my return after that incident with the Sainsbury’s chocolate pudding in January, though I maintain it wasn’t my fault.

Recently, I’ve told myself that I’m going to maintain my running schedule in Cambridge. Don’t get me wrong, I won’t. But it’s nice to think that I will. I’m secretly hoping that it will get too cold so that I simply won’t be able to leave my warm and welcoming room. Hopefully the weather will get on board with me too. I think it’s the one thing British Winter will be able to help me with.

I’m very happy I have no exams this term (or at least I hope?) to keep me awake at night. After my rather unfortunate driving test, I’d quite like to resign from all examination systems with immediate notice. I’m not counting my theory test as an exam because then that will make it real which I don’t particularly fancy. I’m looking forward to cycling around Cambridge and turning up to places with blue fingers, shaking excessively because I decided to wear a mini skirt or something.

I’m also looking forward to continuing to miss my lectures but actually being able to catch up this time because they will be online. I’m not too excited about attending societies via Zoom though, but I’ll probably just do what I usually do and not show up (sorry about that). However, I am devastated because I really wanted to join the Tea Society this term and now I don’t know what will become of it.

I’ve been asked to talk about how I am going to deal with the unknown in this article. The honest answer is I am probably not going to deal with the unknown. I will attempt to do what I generally do, which is to potter along and hope for the best. But come what may, a return to Cambridge necessitates lots of tea and talking, which I have endless energy for. If it helps, you probably can’t be more clueless than me? If you are, that is very impressive, and I fully commend you on your achievement.